The Adventures of a Meat Cooking Vegetarian

Four years ago I met a guy in my college dorm. A year ago I married him. The caveat? I’m a vegetarian and he is an animal killing, meat eating, hunter. You may ask how a vegetarian can live with a guy who enjoys going on trips where he kills animals. I don’t know either. I do know how I deal with it. I figure that if he is going to eat meat, hunting is as close to free-range as someone can get, and trust me he is going to eat meat- his family has animal heads all over their walls. Imagine waking up in the morning and staring up at a dead deer when you come to visit. Blehk.

Cooking for him presents a whole new challenge. I am a nurturer. I want to be able to cook meals that he loves. My husband is more than willing to eat vegetarian sometimes with me and in no way expects me to cook meat, but beans get boring for him. He is lactose and soy sensitive; no one wants to be in the same room with him after he’s eaten a tempeh burger. This means that I am a vegetarian who is learning to cook meat.

I have not cooked meat in 8 years. At that point I was in high school and really didn’t know how to do more than cook ground beef and microwave pizza poppers. For this last year I have been trying to expand my horizons and make more than chicken and ground beef for my spouse.

Tonight I am making steak for the first time. I am so nervous to even open the package. I can see the blood welling up around the meat. I mean, I became a vegetarian so I didn’t have to ever cook this crap again. Now I find myself trying to get past the ick factor just to lay it out on the plate like the recipe says to do. I want to cook for my husband badly, but it takes a lot of will power. I just have to fixate on the look of surprise he will have on his face when he comes home to a piece of steak all cooked up for him. Wish me luck!

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